Life's Harvest

 

For some reason the above painting really struck a chord with me.  Could be because I've got this insomnia going on.  Every night I go to bed at 9ish (I'm a creature of habit, habit is security to me and for me - really worries me when I don't have my "routine") I'm awake every hour to go visit the ladies room (sorry if that is TMI but it's the way it is) and at 12 midnight or within the hour, I'm wide awake and up playing farmville, writing in the blog, outside having a smoke with the "boys" etc..  It usually lasts 2 to 3 hours then my mind calms down enough to where I go back to bed and try to sleep a couple more hours.  I get up at 5 a.m. pretty much every morning that C. works so that I can make her breakfast and lunch to take with her.  Then I make my breakfast once she leaves.  We talk on the phone every morning till she gets to work.  I don't know if this is habit for her or if she really wants to because she hates "brain silence" - she says she thinks too much without the radio on or the TV or being able to talk to someone.  

Anyway, I try to take a nap after I eat breakfast and sleep for at least a couple hours - I sleep until I have to get up for work or on the days I'm off I sleep till whenever I happen to wake up.  I have absolutely no healthy sleep routine at all.  Because of that I'm very tired all of the time it seems. ::shrug::

This weekend C. and I drove to Dallas because she wanted to get her stepfather something from Sheplar's I think that's how it's spelled - it's a "real" country western clothing store & go to another store that has boxed sets of old Bonanza and Andy Griffith TV shows for B boy.  We got those - meanwhile I'm hot flashing away and feeling like I'm suffocating lol.  Hormones are going berserk & I'm ready to crawl out of my skin. Afterward she took me to "Joe's Crab Shack" for dinner.  That was really sweet because she knows how much I love seafood.  Plus the fact that other than Red Lobster (which I don't consider a real seafood restaurant, it's all hot air mostly) where you can get seafood in this part of Texas. I get so tired of Tilapia, Catfish or Salmon!  If you do happen to find a grocery store that sells seafood (fish, scallops, frozen shrimp in the shell etc.) you pay a fortune for it.

Back to the story at hand.  We had a combo for two that had Dungeness Crab Clusters, Snow Crab Clusters, Sausages (kind of like Kielbasa) and Boiled Shrimp - they serve it w/ corn on the cob & new potatoes.  We ate the majority of it (the crab) and brought the sausages home for the boys (yes, they loved them).  We also shared one Margarita :) and then we set off for home again. Dallas traffic is awful on a good day - for some reason though the traffic was worse than usual, Dallas has a lot of road construction going on so it made it an even rougher going.  It's hard for me to sit in a vehicle for too long anymore because my legs cramp something awful.

For the most part we had a very nice day together.

I'm not really decided on what I'm fixing for Thanksgiving dinner.  It will hopefully be just the two of us.  C. has 5 days off :)  Granted she told her boss that she was going out of state to get those 5 days, but she has 5 days and she is very excited about that.  It's been probably a year or so that she's had more than one or two days off in a row, did I mention she's a workaholic? plus she has to work twice as hard at what she does because she is working in a field of work that consists of 85 percent males.  That's a whole another story though.

Anyway back to the dinner - I know I'm baking a ham.  I'm not huge on Turkey :(  I'd like to eventually roast a Duck on the holidays if I can talk C. into it.  I'm baking Strawberry Cupcakes and some cookies for dessert.  Probably steaming some green beans and a batch of mashed potatoes and a pan of Crackling Cornbread.  

I have to work Tues, Wed & Friday. The restaurant is closed T'day.

I'm rather worried about my health.  It's not good.  It's not just the menopause that's going on - I haven't talked to C. about it because she grew up w/ a hypochondriac mom and has no patience w/ people and their "not feeling well's" I can't talk to her and I won't ask her to  help me money wise.  She told me it's up to me to work things out.  I have been having symptoms of Diabetes.  I also have symptoms of Shingles.  I can't afford to go to the Clinic.  I have debated going to the ER but it's not like it's a emergency or anything, I have no insurance... can't afford it.  C. has insurance.  So I'm stuck.  I don't know what to do.

That's enough for this post.  I'm tired of what seems to me to be whining. I hate to whine.

Say a prayer for me or whatever it is you all do.